Love Blinders

Hello!


I have not written in forever! I have had nothing really to write about but I have been really busy also! Believe it or not. I am back at my other office in Dallas, and with that comes a lot more to do- which I love. I also love that I am back to being around more places to eat for lunch. Which has really affected me in the last two weeks. Got on the scale today- Complete 5lbs since last time I weigh, ( I am gonna go with too much sodium this weekend ) and that is added to the love pounds I gained in the first year Lucas and I started dating! (Well 12 the first year and 10 the next. I am getting on the treadmill after work and never getting off. )I have also got to put down the miller light and cheese. I mean 5'1 and 20 or so pounds is pretty noticeable!

It doesn't help that Lucas wears LOVE BLINDERS. He like seriously does not see how I really look. You know that In Touch weekly with Kim Kardashian on the front a couple weeks ago, where she was "unretouched" ( please) Well I had that in our bathroom and after Luke had spent some time in there- using the bathroom, he comes out with that magazine in hand. He goes " Babe, minus the boobs, this is totally what you look like in a bathing suit. " He goes "that's exactly what your tummy looks like." First of all- no the boob thing didn't bother me, I am realistic, those will come after I pop some chillens out- but seriously. I do not know what angle or lighting I must stubble into when I am in a bikini around Lucas. I mean maybe in the pitch black night I could maybe resemble the shape of her, maybe, and that is kind of complimenting myself a little too much. Obviously not the lighting in the Dillards dressing rooms! My goodness do they have to be that telling! I was appalled this weekend! Regardless- I do NOT look like her, and I am not just being hard on myself! That girl claims to be a size 2- which I really don't now what over sized store she shops in- but I haven't been a size two since I think 1st grade! If I ever was- I think I just skipped from kids clothes to an 8! ( And added to that over the years!) Another thing that I love he says- is like this weekend. I was getting ready for the weddings we were going to- ( plural bc yes we went to 2! Pretty Ruff!) I am putting on my makeup- and I had fake eyelashes on- which now after looking at a few pics that were taken- made me look like a tranny about to perform! I got them a little long this time, (also, I realized, spanks are not a miracle worker- you have to meet them half way- just because you have them on doesn't mean you can actually stick your stomach out as if trying to compete with a 7 mth pregnant girl, I mean after looking at pictures, I realized those give me a false sense of self. I was appalled!) but you know I am putting on more than I normally wear- like eyeliner etc. I always have on makeup but I guess I do not really wear that much besides mascara, eyeshadow and lipstick-I don't really wear anything on my face besides bronzer, which "The Lady" hates! " It looks a little orange" she says- yeah better than a little white! I am a natural strawberry blond! Don't have the darkest skin tone, Mom! But anyways. I go into the other bathroom where I have made him get ready! ( I swear I am a nice wife - it just gets so humid when he showers in our bathroom- I mean he waits until I have just taken out the curlers and says" I am gonna get in now" Thanks- why didn't I just let my Janis Joplin Fro air dry?)ANYWAYS- I ask him " Do I have on too much makeup?" - he goes " NO, I think you look hot!" I rolled my eyes of course and said " No seriously babe, I kind of look like a hoe!" He goes" Who cares?" " I said " I do- u should. We both should- why would you want your wife to look like a hooker? Why would you even say that? Why are you putting gel in your hair if your answer is" Who Cares?" I DO! " Anyways he goes on to say- " Babe you look fine, it's just because you don't really wear makeup bc you are so naturally pretty!" BLINDERS! Has he ever seen me without eyebrows and mascara? I look like an alien! For like the first year he never saw me without mascara. I remember I had to go to the emergency room after about a year of dating bc I had something called pleurisy( spelling) and in as much pain as I was in, crying etc, I went to the bathroom and reapplied my mascara! And yes I wear makeup! I swear he really wears love goggles! I guess I shouldn't be complaining. It is really sweet that he sees me like that- but it has made the gaining weight a little easier! Which is not good!

Anyways- so two weddings in one night is ruff! I will say both brides looked beautiful and I took advantage of the open bars- Man did I ever. But as I was recapping the night to my sister the next day, she reminded me of something. I ALWAYS take advantage of the open bars at weddings. I remember my sister's wedding, I was helping get things together after her and Ryan had left and The Lady asked me a question, and I turned to her and answered her, and she goes "Oh Jodie, you need to eat something, tomorrow is not gonna be pretty!" I make her proud sometimes I think! (This was after Lucas and I cleared the dance floor to perform our version of "My Humps" by the Black eyed Peas- yeah it's on her wedding video and I have only seen it once, but I have to say I am not as great of a dancer as I think after a few drinks, and definitely not as hot! And kind of made her wedding a little more about me.......Blah blah blah!)

I think the only wedding I was good at was mine! And that was just because you don't really have time to drink too much at your own. I did however have time to do my version of " Rolling on a River" by Ike and Tina!( With No Ike! Not sure where he was!) And I wonder why my hair fell flat at my wedding! Our video still, for some strange reason, has not come in, but I am sure I will be pretty embarrassed seeing my flushed face as Tina! I bet it was pretty!

Anyways- my life is going to consist of weight loss and healthy habits, and work, and of Course- The Huz! I think it's time to drop the love pounds- even if Lucas says no bc he won't have anything to grab onto! Oh please- I am not sure if he has really ever looked at me! I have never been a waif! Oh well! Some girls have it worse! My husband loves the crap outta me! And I love him so much, and I love that he loves me so much! Even if I like to make fun of him in my blogs! He is just really a funny guy!

Love ya'll!