Happy Labor Day Weekend!

19 weeks and 1 day today, we plan on using our labor day holiday to relax and find the right paint color for the nursery.


Here is my 19 week picture, I can't imagine I get even bigger, but word is I have only just begun!

And we POPPED!!!!!

We are almost 1/2 way there and I woke up this morning and was shocked by what I saw.......... He Popped! We are officially showing, maybe I have been but today I really noticed! We also got some new adorble clothes and blanket from Gran-mommie too!


(Even though she still calls him Molly, and won't probably call him Jackson until the actual sono tech at my Dr's office confirms he is a HE on September 5th!)

18 weeks today- it's a good day!

(not normally one to self-promote with the in the mirror facebook/iphone shot, but I didn't want to ask one of my shop guys to snap a picture at work!)

Prayers for Kick, Kick, Kicks!

As any normal hypochondriac, and just plain maniac- I am constantly worried about this baby! I woke up today and decided that I haven't felt him kick in awhile (even though I am sure he had just kicked me...... )I got so nervous, I was thinking horrible things, and wondering if I could call my Doctor and ask if I could come in to listen to the heart. I wanted to make sure that everything was ok. I instantly started thinking of how I would tell Lucas, after he got so on board with this baby being a boy, and how I would let my family know he was no longer moving. I sat there on my bed and tried to collect myself- in the five minutes I had until I HAD to be in the shower. I prayed that God would let me feel my little baby, just to make sure everything was ok. At about 8:30 AM about 2 1/2 hours after I had asked God for my sign, he started kicking- and has continued to do so all day today. I don't normally enjoy the kicks, butterflies in an aquarium- (as my Mom described it) is not how I think it feels. I think it kind of hurts and is a little annoying- which I am sure is terrible for me to say. But I am being honest- they can kind of hurt, well everything kind of hurts me lately. I used to think I had a high pain tolerance, but I am beginning to think I may possibly be the biggest baby in the entire world.


I have already decided not to even think about labor until further notice. And by everything hurts, I mean I am starting to get uncomfortable. Even though I do not think I am showing, I still think I look chubby like I eat too much- my sister kind of told me I was delusional today, everything is starting to get uncomfortable. I can't believe it only gets worse! I started swelling last week- my ankles were huge Thursday evening and all day Friday. But it went away soon after, just drinking lots of water and keeping my feet up. I put a cardboard box under my desk, so they are raised up at work too! I can only wear one ring at a time though, I can either wear my engagement ring, or my wedding band- but not both right now. Last week at the Doctor I was asking him about a weird thing I noticed and I am glad he was straight up with me. He said
"Yeah, a lot of really, really weird things happen during pregnancy, woman who say it is so beautiful, I don't really get what they are talking about!" Typical man, good to know he's honest!

More and more weird thing happen all the time. Like I can't get comfortable at night in bed if I put lotion on my legs before I go to bed. I do not know why this is, and probably has nothing to do with pregnancy but I learned that the hard way! Just a warm bath before bed, to help with leg cramps, no lotion. My back is starting to hurt, and I am not sleeping well. Being a face down tummy sleeper, this left side business is a big adjustment, but I am trying to very hard because I am scared of everything that may happen if you don't- mainly physical. Like Varicrose veins, which I have googled so many times, my phone won't even let me look at information on them anymore, high blood pressure, and everything else. So left side sleeping it is. I fight with Skeeter every night, which wakes Luke up too, but she knows there is something in my belly and wants to cozy up to me and my tummy, between me and my pillows. One to grab on to and one in between my legs because I googled it, or read that it can help with something. I am a big box of knowledge right now, although I dont really know what goes with what. I just know a lot of stuff! I wake up with numbs hand every morning, but I don't think it's carpel tunnel- I think it is because I sleep with my hands under my pillow. Or that's what I am choosing to tell myself. I was trying to reach for something under my bed and so I layed down on my back on the floor to try to slip under, and realized my tummy stuck up too much or my butt stuck out too much, either way- laying on the floor on your back doesn't work at this point. Luke had to help me up. Very weird things..........

There is my rant, this is my blog, so I think it is ok to let it all out here!

- I know this is all worth it, and I can't wait to see what's next to come for me and my JJ.

(That's my new nickname for him because right now we are Jodie and Jackson living as one, so JJ! We have the same initials too, I sure do hope he doesn't have Mommy issues, but if he never wants to leave the house and get married I think I will be fine with that! )

The picture is our walls in the nursery we are trying to paint- as you can see we are getting no where fast!

Crazy Celebrity Births!

Now I am sure that this is a beautiful way to bring a baby in to the world, but I just don't see me and Luke in our tiny backyard in a kiddie pool with the dogs barking at us! But I found this funny, but alittle too "hippie" for us!


http://celebritybabies.people.com/2012/08/15/josie-maran-blog-homebirth-backyard/

Boy O Boy O Boy- It's a BOY!

Oh Boy!!!!!!

Well to my shock we are having a baby boy!!!!!!!! The moment the sono tech told us that little thing right there is a boy part, my mouth dropped. I like to think of myself as kind of psychic, typically I can actually tell the future. I find often that I know what people are going to say, or what they are thinking and will answer a question of Luke's before it is asked- you know, I have a sixth sense I think. So I was for sure, 100% that we were having a girl. The second I found out I was pregnant, I thought girl, so did Luke! So I was a little bit shocked to say the least. First of all, I had my entire shabby chic nursery decorated in my head, as well as a couple vendors awaiting my call, that YES, we will take the dresser/changing table. I had her name planned, I had everything planned, and when I say planned, I mean planned. I am a bit of a planner, I do not work on a surprise schedule, I am not in any way a go with the flow person. My husband is, he loves to "play it by ear"- it makes my skin crawl. I am always asking him what's the plan? It drives him nuts, but in my defense, it drives me crazy to run on a "we'll see" schedule. SHOCKED!!!!!

It took me a day to get over my shock. I felt so guilty because my crazy mind was worrying I would never connect to my baby because he is not what I planned! I had my big cry Saturday evening around 10:00 PM, and then woke up the next morning happy and excited! I don't know what I was so worried about! I love my nephews, they are the light of life, so I know this little guy is meant to be for us, and I am so happy Luke will get what he always wanted- someone to throw the ball with! I loved seeing how excited he got once it registered that he was having a boy. I know Miss Hadley is pretty much wrapped around his finger, but I think he is glad to have a lil man!

So I did what I always do with my Mom when something in my life doesn't go as planned- WE WENT SHOPPING!!!! Sunday, we ran over to Pottery Barn Baby and picked out basically everything he needs for his bedding and room! It felt like when I got new clinique makeup, a brown drawstring Dooney and Burke, and some new K-Swiss tennis shoes after I didn't make the Oakridge Mascot-(6th grade, if that explains the style-) why I even wanted to be that I have no idea! Someday I think I will wonder why I ever planned on him being a girl too! Baby Jackson or Jax as we may call him for short, will be so loved, and he sure does have some pals on both sides of the family, I think he will fit in just fine! I can't wait to meet him!!!!! He will be everything we didn't even know we wanted!

( I had Luke put all my Barbies and American Girl dolls in storage. Maybe I will get them out someday, or not, we just can't plan our future!)

August 10, 2012

Hello Family and friends- WE ARE PREGGO!

It has been awhile since I last blogged, since 2010. Lucas and I are so excited and blessed in our lives, I felt that it was time to start blogging again. The past two years have been hard on us, but with lots of prayers, patience, and lots of tears we can finally say we are pregnant!!!!!!! In May we found out that to our surprise we were knocked up! I will never forget the moment I found out! So I will skip the past two years of tears and start this blog with the joy! On May 18- we were headed to a surprise party for my Mother in Law's birthday in Ft Worth. I casually filled Luke in on some information, trying not to make a big deal about it. I said "You know It's day 28 and I am not having any PMS, I am in a great mood, don't you think?" he was trying to hurry and get us there and was frustrated with Ft Worth traffic and was having some PMS of his own and he basically ignored my comment. He was so used to me coming up with fictional symptoms that may mean I am pregnant. SO I kind of just dropped it, thinking to myself, no back pain, no cramps, no moodiness, and a few other signs of pregancy that I had only heard of but never experienced. So we went to the party and had a great time. We had a great evening, and went on home. I went to bed that night, trying to convince myself not to get my hopes up. But something about the past month felt different. The 2 weeks before this I had been more emotional than I ever have in my life. I remember feeling like this is what hitting rock bottom with emoitons must really be. Another Mother's day. I thought for sure by this one I would be pregnant. If I had it my way I would be happy with a 1 1/2 year old, but God had a different plan for us. I remember standing in the kitchen when Lucas gave me a card from him and the dogs. It was a big card that played a song when you opened it. I asked him not to get me anything this year, as he normally does from him and the dogs, I just didn't want to acknowledge it. He didn't listen and when I opened the card and "Somewhere over the Rainbow", a very special song to me, started playing I lost it. I ran to my room, closed my closet door and sat there and cried. That is where I do my best crying for some reason and Lucas knows to just let me have my moment and not check on me when I am in my dark closet. I remember praying and telling God I have hit rock bottom with my emotions, I can't take it anymore. Please God help me, help us. I pulled myself together and went to church. It was a very hard service for me to get through. All about Mothers and Mothers day. At the end they asked women who had lost a child, or couldn't have a child to come down and pray. I couldn't move my legs to stand but my Mother in law got up and went down there, and I know she did that for me. We never spoke about our problem, but after almost four years of marriage it kind of becomes the elephant in the room, and you begin to notice nobody asks the dreaded question anymore........ When are you going to have a baby???? I got so tired of lying my way through that question. SO back to May 19, 2012- we woke up and like any normal Saturday, Lucas got up and got dressed to go to the office. I was just in slow motion as I always am on Saturdays, taking my time, fixing some breakfast, watching some Housewives, the usual. Luke left and I thought to myself, I am going to take a test. I have taken many tests in the past two years, never once getting a positive sign. I told myself not to get my hopes up, but take it and look at it in a little bit. I waited 10 whole minutes. It was my last test I had in the house too. Oh the irony...... I walked back in to my bathroom and I remember saying a prayer, that I have said often to myself- "Please God, let me be pregnant". To my shock, it was very dark positive!!!!!!!!!! I was so excited, I grabbed my phone and dialed Lucas, hung up. Dialed again and hung up. I thought I have to tell him in person. So I grabbed the test, jumped in the car, and drove to his office. Now let me remind you, I was in slow motion that morning. I had not done any of the following: brushed my teeth, brushed my hair, washed my face, meaning I had Alice Cooper eyes, I did not have a bra on, still in my pj's, not pretty, I did not have on any shoes, and did I mention I had not even brushed my teeth??? SO I get there and run in the office, no shoes in a parking lot, by the way. Lucas was surprised to see me, but was on a phone call with a customer. I waited there with my hands behind my back, positive test in hand...... GET OFF THE DAMN PHONE, I thought! He was giving me the "Child-you done lost your mind" eyes, I saw him glance at me and look me up and down to see that I was bra-less, shoeless- hairbrush impaired, etc. He must have thought, well this is it, she has actually lost it. I know he fears I will lose it someday, doesn't everybody? I have those tendencies! So he hung up and said something like what the hell are you doing here crazy girl- and I handed him the test. Once I got it through his little head that we were pregnant, we were so excited, hugging, kissing, looking at my belly, dancing, screaming, shouting, crying, crying,and more crying!!!!!! I went home, grabbed some shoes and fixed myself a bit and the first place I went was to Gil's grave. I felt that I needed to go there and tell him Thank you for helping us out with this blessing. I knew Lucas and I had asked him to nudge God a little and let us be pregnant. I told Gil that day how proud he would be of his son, all of the changes he has made in his life, all the maturing he had done, how he is running his business so well and what a wonderful person he is, even though I know he knows all this. I left there and grabbed some more test. 7 test later, all positive, I could finally say out loud- I am pregnant!!!!!! So this brings us to now- we are 16 weeks pregnant, and loving every minute of it, well I think that is what I am supposed to say! It's not all that fun being pregnant, but I know the outcome will be worth it! I am feeling good, healthy and happy! Weird things are happening everyday, like the fact that I ate two breakfasts yesterday, but I am just trying to roll with it. I know Luke misses the old me, the one who didn't snap at him if he looks at me or the dogs wrong, but he is adjusting to this new round tummy girl! (He is also adjusting to the fact that there are lots more pillows on the bed and he better not even let a pinky toe touch me at night or I will slap him.) We find out the gender tomorrow. We are going to Ultraview, and we are so excited to get to see our baby again! We are finding out early, because I can't wait any longer- We haven't seen it since I was 10 weeks. So I am sure it looks alot different. Everyone thinks it is a girl, but who knows. The names we have picked out are Jackson Allen Ward, or Molly Ann Ward. I am totally in love with both names, and in love with whatever "it" decides to be! God has totally blessed us, we couldn't be more excited and happy- life feels almost complete! This blog will be our fun way to keep those close to us up to date with all the goings on in my belly and our lives as we become parents to our first two legg'd baby. Big and Skeeter are very excited to have another sibling too! January 25, 2013 is right around the corner! Love, Jodie, Lucas, Mr. Big, Skeeter J, and Baby Ward!