Well to my shock we are having a baby boy!!!!!!!! The moment the sono tech told us that little thing right there is a boy part, my mouth dropped. I like to think of myself as kind of psychic, typically I can actually tell the future. I find often that I know what people are going to say, or what they are thinking and will answer a question of Luke's before it is asked- you know, I have a sixth sense I think. So I was for sure, 100% that we were having a girl. The second I found out I was pregnant, I thought girl, so did Luke! So I was a little bit shocked to say the least. First of all, I had my entire shabby chic nursery decorated in my head, as well as a couple vendors awaiting my call, that YES, we will take the dresser/changing table. I had her name planned, I had everything planned, and when I say planned, I mean planned. I am a bit of a planner, I do not work on a surprise schedule, I am not in any way a go with the flow person. My husband is, he loves to "play it by ear"- it makes my skin crawl. I am always asking him what's the plan? It drives him nuts, but in my defense, it drives me crazy to run on a "we'll see" schedule. SHOCKED!!!!!
It took me a day to get over my shock. I felt so guilty because my crazy mind was worrying I would never connect to my baby because he is not what I planned! I had my big cry Saturday evening around 10:00 PM, and then woke up the next morning happy and excited! I don't know what I was so worried about! I love my nephews, they are the light of life, so I know this little guy is meant to be for us, and I am so happy Luke will get what he always wanted- someone to throw the ball with! I loved seeing how excited he got once it registered that he was having a boy. I know Miss Hadley is pretty much wrapped around his finger, but I think he is glad to have a lil man!
So I did what I always do with my Mom when something in my life doesn't go as planned- WE WENT SHOPPING!!!! Sunday, we ran over to Pottery Barn Baby and picked out basically everything he needs for his bedding and room! It felt like when I got new clinique makeup, a brown drawstring Dooney and Burke, and some new K-Swiss tennis shoes after I didn't make the Oakridge Mascot-(6th grade, if that explains the style-) why I even wanted to be that I have no idea! Someday I think I will wonder why I ever planned on him being a girl too! Baby Jackson or Jax as we may call him for short, will be so loved, and he sure does have some pals on both sides of the family, I think he will fit in just fine! I can't wait to meet him!!!!! He will be everything we didn't even know we wanted!
( I had Luke put all my Barbies and American Girl dolls in storage. Maybe I will get them out someday, or not, we just can't plan our future!)
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